When Your Nickname Becomes Your Halloween Costume
Mitch McConnell, the Senate Minority Leader who has been called a turtle so many times that he’s apparently just embraced it, showed up to Halloween 2025 in a full turtle costume. The ensemble featured a shell, little turtle feet, and that same expression McConnell always haslike he’s plotting something while moving very, very slowly.
The turtle costume is either the greatest act of political judo ever or proof that McConnell has completely lost the plot. For years, critics have called him “Moscow Mitch” and compared him to a turtle, and instead of fighting the comparison, he’s leaned into it so hard he’s literally wearing a shell. It’s the political equivalent of “you can’t fire me, I quit,” except it’s “you can’t mock me, I’ll mock myself first.”
McConnell’s turtle costume choice demonstrates either supreme confidence or complete surrender to his public image. When your defining physical characteristic becomes your Halloween costume, you’ve either mastered self-deprecating humor or given up on human dignity. With McConnell, it could go either way.
The costume appeared at a Republican fundraiser in Kentucky, where attendees reportedly didn’t know whether to laugh or worry about their elderly senator’s mental state. McConnell shambled around in the turtle suit making slow, deliberate movements, which isn’t that different from how he normally moves, suggesting this might be less costume and more documentary.
McConnell’s decision to step down from Senate leadership makes the turtle costume even more apt. Turtles are known for their longevity and for eventually retreating into their shells. McConnell has been in the Senate since the Mesozoic Era (approximately), and now he’s finally pulling back into his shell, letting someone else lead while he plots from the backbench.
The shell itself was reportedly custom-made, which raises questions about how much this costume cost and whether campaign funds were involved. Imagine being the costume designer who gets the commission to create a turtle suit for one of the most powerful politicians in America. That’s either a dream job or proof you’ve made terrible life choices.
Critics immediately mocked the costume, because that’s what critics do. “Mitch McConnell dresses as turtle, confirms decades of suspicions,” wrote one Twitter user. “Breaking: McConnell reveals true form,” joked another. The jokes write themselves when you’re an 82-year-old politician dressed as a reptile known for slowness.
McConnell’s Senate legacy is complicated, much like people’s feelings about turtles. Some find them wise and enduring; others find them slow and obstinate. The costume works because it captures both interpretationsMcConnell as either the wise elder statesman or the stubborn obstacle, depending on your political perspective.
The best part? McConnell stayed in character all night, speaking slowly and occasionally pretending to retreat into his shell when asked difficult questions about Trump. It’s method acting meets political satire, and honestly, it’s the most relatable thing McConnell has ever done. Everyone’s wanted to retreat into a shell when asked about politics in 2025.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/mitch-mcconnell%c2%92s-turtle-time/0
SOURCE: Sarah Pappalardo (https://bohiney.com/mitch-mcconnell%c2%92s-turtle-time/0)
